To travel a long distance, we usually need a vehicle – a perfectly running one. We can easily say that the distance is the journey of life, the vehicle is the body and our thoughts are its fuel.
In order to learn further and get higher education, students choose a university (based on the score), check out the curriculum, its faculty, its equity and once satisfied, put forth an application. Once the application is approved, they choose the subjects, the timings and so on.
In the circle of life, the soul does the same. In order to learn a new lesson, based on its previous Karma (score) it gets to choose the country, place, parents and the learning path. To travel on this path, it needs a vehicle and that is THE PHYSICAL BODY.
So many students take admission in the university every year. Some become toppers, some score decent marks while some get distracted and lose themselves, eventually dropping out. This is what happens to souls as well.
When the soul is born on planet Earth (the school), it depends on the parents (the teachers) for its elementary and primary guidance. This is why the mother is said to be the first and primary GURU. She not only guides but nurtures the child too.
The soul, like a good learner must walk on the chosen path and reach its goal, learn the lesson it signed up for.
Often when a vehicle, loaded with many attractive functions and features, is given to a driver, the driver gets so mesmerized by the mechanism and functionality of the vehicle that he forgets to drive, ignores the purpose and ends up disregarding the destination.
Similarly, the soul may get mesmerized and get distracted by the “Maya” created by the 5 senses of the PHYSICAL BODY.
The vehicle loaded with the latest features, was provided to make the journey smooth and fast. Did the driver use it well? The usage makes the difference. The PHYSICAL BODY has many magical features, it is on the owner to make the legitimate use of it and remain focused on the journey and reach the destination.
Let us now talk about the “soul-contract”.
In order to learn the lesson, the soul chooses the teachers who could be parents, friends, spouse, relatives etc. It gets into a contract with them before taking birth. Karmic teachers are the ones who are strict and ruthless. For instance, if someone’s father is very dominating and strict, he could be the Karmic Teacher of the soul (child) in this life. The lesson could be “to learn to be disciplined”. Let us not forget that it is the soul, who had signed up for this lesson and signed a contract with the father requesting him to be the Karmic Teacher and not vice versa.
The soul, once gets into the body, tends to forget these contracts because of the MAYA that the body creates. Only with meditation and self-work, one can understand his/her life purpose and work towards it.
Deviation is easy:
There lived a farmer. His name was Muski. He grew up seeing his father working hard on fields each day with all his honesty. The father led a very simple life doing the same set of things each day. He had not many friends. He did not waste time in village gossips either. Sometimes, he would sit with Muski and tell him stories of his grandparents, teach him about seeds and plants and the river. The family had enough to survive peacefully within their limited means. When Muski became a teen, the father started to teach him to plough. Muski was a good learner. He soon took over from his father. Days passed by peacefully.
One day, the father passed away. Muski followed his father’s footsteps and continued to be a hard-working farmer. Two years later, his fellow farmer bought a tractor to plough his fields that worked faster and didn’t require so much hard work. Muski was very impressed and wanted one too but it costed a lot of money. He didn’t have even one tenth of it. His father had never advised to borrow money but Muski wanted to own the tractor. The money lender asked Muski to mortgage his land and the house against the money. Muski calculated and figured if he ploughed the fields with the tractor he would grow more and faster. Also, instead of selling his crops in the local market, if he went to the city, he would fetch more money and would be able to repay the loan in 5 years easily. He mortgaged the house and the land and borrowed the money. Things worked for him. He started to earn well and after a year got married too. The next year he became a father but the child was born with a hole in the heart. Travelling to hospitals and the treatment incurred a lot of expense and took up a lot of his time. He could no longer work efficiently and started getting stressed. The loan was weighing heavily on his shoulders all the time. He lost all his peace and took to drinking. The farming started to suffer. Soon he was under a lot of debt and the tenure of 5 years got over. Muski had no means to return the money. With a heavy heart, he sold his tractor, sold his land, repaid the money and left the village. His wife had already fought with him and had gone to her parents with the child. Muski went to the city and started to work as a labourer at a construction site. He worked five times more than he what he did when he ploughed his fields without the tractor. He could only repent now.
All this happened because Muski got distracted from the path of leading a simple life, taught by his father. He got deviated and got mesmerized by the MAYA and created a painful life- journey for himself.
Now, take a half an hour break, sit at a quiet corner comfortably and introspect your life. Who are you-Muski or his father?
Remember, life can always be started on a fresh note. If you do not complete your lesson that you signed up for, you will have to come back and start all over again.
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) A Comprehensive Guide
In the realm of mental health, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) has emerged as a powerful and effective approach to understanding and treating various psychological issues. With its focus on the connection between thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, CBT offers individuals the opportunity to gain insight into their patterns of thinking and make positive changes that lead to improved mental well-being. In this blog, we will delve into the fundamentals of CBT, explore its benefits, and highlight how it can empower individuals to transform their lives.
1. Understanding the Basics of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy:
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is a goal-oriented, evidence-based approach that addresses the interplay between our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. It recognizes that our perceptions and interpretations of events shape our emotional responses and subsequent actions. By identifying and challenging negative or distorted thoughts, CBT helps individuals reframe their thinking patterns, leading to healthier emotions and behaviors.
2. Identifying Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Distortions:
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy involves recognizing and addressing cognitive distortions—irrational or inaccurate thought patterns that contribute to negative emotions and behaviors. Common cognitive distortions include all-or-nothing thinking, overgeneralization, mental filtering, and catastrophizing. By becoming aware of these distortions, individuals can learn to challenge and replace them with more realistic and balanced thoughts.
3. Restructuring Negative Thoughts:
Once cognitive distortions are identified, CBT focuses on restructuring negative thoughts through a process called cognitive restructuring. This technique involves examining the evidence for and against negative thoughts, finding alternative explanations, and developing more adaptive and constructive ways of thinking. By actively replacing negative thoughts with positive and realistic ones, individuals can significantly improve their emotional well-being.
4. Behavior Modification:
CBT not only addresses thoughts and beliefs but also emphasizes behavior modification. By identifying and altering maladaptive behaviors that contribute to psychological distress, individuals can break negative cycles and develop healthier patterns of functioning. Through techniques such as exposure therapy, behavioral experiments, and problem-solving strategies, CBT equips individuals with practical tools to overcome challenges and achieve positive behavioral changes.
5. Developing Coping Skills:
Another crucial aspect of CBT is the development of effective coping skills. Individuals learn adaptive strategies to manage stress, regulate emotions, and handle challenging situations. By acquiring and practicing these coping skills, individuals become more resilient and better equipped to navigate life’s difficulties, reducing the risk of relapse and promoting long-term well-being.
6. Collaborative Therapeutic Relationship:
CBT is typically conducted in a collaborative therapeutic relationship between the individual and the therapist. The therapist acts as a guide and facilitator, providing support, empathy, and guidance throughout the therapy process. This collaborative approach fosters a safe and trusting environment, enabling individuals to explore their thoughts and emotions without judgment.
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is a transformative approach that empowers individuals to take an active role in their mental well-being. By addressing negative thought patterns, restructuring cognitive distortions, modifying behaviors, and developing coping skills, CBT offers a path to lasting change. Whether you’re struggling with anxiety, depression, or other mental health concerns, CBT can provide the tools and insights needed to overcome challenges and lead a more fulfilling life. Embrace the power of CBT and unlock the potential for positive transformation in your journey towards mental well-being.
4 incredible Compassion-Focused Therapy (CFT) products you’ll wish you discovered sooner
The therapy strategy known as Compassion-Focused Therapy (CFT) was created by psychologist Paul Gilbert. To address difficulties relating to self-criticism, shame, and self-compassion, it draws on a variety of disciplines including evolutionary psychology, neuroscience, and Buddhist psychology.
CFT seeks to foster inner warmth and acceptance as well as compassion for oneself and others. It acknowledges that a lot of psychological issues stem from how people relate to themselves and others, which is frequently marked by self-criticism, shame, and a lack of self-compassion. In order to promote emotional healing and wellbeing, CFT aims to cultivate compassion. This secure and caring atmosphere is created within.
The main tenets of CFT are as follows:
1. Compassionate Mind Training:
Compassion Focused Therapy uses techniques including mindfulness, visualisation, and compassionate self-talk to help people cultivate a compassionate mind. The aim is to establish a kind, loving, and understanding attitude towards oneself and others as well as to promote self-compassion.
2. Evolutionary psychology:
Compassion Focused Therapy investigates how human emotions and behaviours have evolved through time. It recognises that our brains have evolved to be extremely perceptive to dangers and self-protection, but it emphasises the necessity of striking a balance between this and the capacity for self-soothing and demonstrating love and caring.
3. Emotional Regulation:
Compassion Focused Therapy focuses on assisting people in controlling and managing challenging emotions including anger, humiliation, and guilt. People can develop emotional resilience by cultivating a caring mindset, which teaches them how to calm down and comfort themselves when confronted with difficult feelings.
4. Relational Focus:
Compassion Focused Therapy recognises how important connections are to maintaining our wellbeing. It places a strong emphasis on developing compassionate connections with oneself and others. People can improve their capacity to relate to others in a loving and empathic way by cultivating a compassionate mentality.
Numerous mental health issues, such as depression, anxiety, trauma, eating disorders, and personality disorders have been treated using compassion-focused therapy. It can be used in conjunction with other therapeutic modalities or as a stand-alone therapy.
While I can give broad information on compassion-focused therapy, it is always advised to seek the advice of a licenced mental health professional who specialises in this method for a thorough knowledge and direction.
DIL KI BAAT, DIL SE
Pankaj was working hard to become a doctor. Pankaj’s desire was to get medical education from a good foreign university. His hard work paid off and he got selected for a medical program in a college in the United States. Pankaj was from an aristocratic business family. All the family members were successful businessmen to whom name and money were all that mattered. His father and all the other elders of the family also wanted to see Pankaj in business. The admission offer was on the table but his family avoided the subject. All other topics of conversation except those concerning business were out of bounds. Pankaj’s dream remained incomplete.
Vandana was meritorious, cheerful and talented. She wanted to have a better career and had the passion to make a difference in life. Even though she had her own ambitions and desires, her family married her off to an affluent man, as is the case in many middle class families. Despite all the material comforts the family had access to , they were often deprived of the luxury of communicating with each other.
Rashmi graduated top of her class and got accepted in a post graduate management course. She fell in love with a classmate who was in the same program as her. The two of them dreamt of spending their lives together. Yet, they didn’t breach the subject to their families for fear of rejection and disapproval.
Shivkaran ji retired after 35 years of service in a big company and got a lot of money after retirement. His children were busy with their jobs in other cities and Shivkaran ji was ‘ busy ‘ with his solitary life. He had no one to talk to.
Nitin got married with a beautiful bride but even after four years could not become a parent. He was plagued by the judgmental looks that he received from the people around him. Hesitating to go to the doctor, Nitin slowly became irritable.
There are many such instances in real life where our inability to communicate hinders our dreams and aspirations. We will find many examples in family, business and in our social circles where lack of communication has led people to become depressed. In an increasingly connected world, real communication has become a rare thing to find. Loneliness is an epidemic that plagues individuals of all ages. Moving away from families, our inability to truly share our thoughts and feelings as well as having fewer real life social connections have only added to the existing problems. If you observe the state of people today, pretending to be ‘busy’ on their phones rather than speaking to people in front of them, you will realize why isolation and loneliness are such prevalent concepts in the modern world.
Thus, to ensure our positive role in the society we wanted to bring a platform, where people can express their views, share their problems and discuss solutions- DIL KI BAAT, DIL SE.
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